A Paradise with Poop

It was a hot August day, and our hands were constantly in motion to swat away the persistent swarm of gnats flocking around our heads. Hopping out of the car, I nearly stepped upon a fresh mound of dog poop steaming on the ground. That alone had to be the sign of an excellent dog breeder. But the poop was the last thing on our minds. The only thing I cared about then was my future puppy. We had found the ad for puppies in the daily newspaper. My father and I had circled it with our red Sharpie and we drove off with high hopes to meet our future dog. Excitement was abounding in the car as we drove the forty minutes to Anoka. This was our second puppy attempt. The first time, my parents and I had ridden in my dad’s black Toyota to a small house on an acre of forests and prickly brambles. We had parked on a narrow dirt road outside of the house and walked up a muddy path to the small brown rambler. The sound of puppies barking melted our hearts, but the boisterous sounds of gunshots made us scamper back to the safety of our automobiles. Although thankfully the shots were not aimed at the puppies, we decided we did not want a dog that was tone deaf and jumpy. Thankfully, this place was different. Even a seven year old could spot that. The shutters were painted a fresh white, and the ground, although spotted with dog poop, was a lush green. It was the ideal suburban home. I could practically see Dick and Jane holding hands and skipping across their lawn together. I could make out Jane’s swinging braids neatly tied with a crisp red ribbon and Dick’s blond hair parted smartly to the side. My father and I started up the sidewalk and knocked on the cheery red door. Our arrival was welcomed with a ferocious barking, and we could hear the scratching of toenails (paw-nails?) as they slid across the floor. A large black snout sniffed at us through the screen and then opened, displaying a vicious set of sharp teeth. It barked and howled until a woman dragged it away to its kennel near the door.

“Please excuse Star,” the woman said as she pushed open the screen door. “She’s just a little jumpy today.” The interior of the house was just as pristine as the outside. The wooden floors glistened, and the pillows were set neatly in pairs of two on the corners of the couch. I was afraid that my muddy sneakers would disturb this serene bubble of cleanliness, so I left them in a sloppy pile by the front door. I eyed the big dog sniffing at me from her kennel. I considered myself quite the dog-whisperer at the time. I was convinced that the strong affection I felt for all dogs was mutual. I figured that they must love me as much as I loved them. So I stuck out my hand and grinned as Star sniffed it with her wet nose. I poked my finger inside the holes of the kennel and stroked her soft paw. I was completely oblivious to the fact that she could have easily bitten my finger off with one snap of the jaw. I was so intent upon smoothing the satiny brown fur on her paw that all aspects of possible danger completely disappeared. When Star was let out of her kennel, she padded over the shiny floor and gave me a slobbery kiss on the face. I watched with amusement as she then growled menacingly at my dad.  

I felt my wet cheek as we made our way down the vacuumed steps and grinned happily to myself. One slimy kiss from a dog was enough to make my day. My grin soon widened into a beaming smile as I took in what was before me. It was as if I was Charlie in the Chocolate Factory or Eve as she saw Paradise for the first time. I was ecstatic. The basement was crawling with nine roly-poly puppies, and I literally squealed with joy as a one ran up and chewed on my pant leg. The soft white carpet was scratched in spots where the little dogs played, and I could make out a few faint yellow stains on the fuzz beside the door. A large play spot was sanctioned off with a flimsy black fence and covered with newspaper. Squeaky puppy toys littered the area, and a few pillows were strewn about. It was heaven. Puppies were everywhere, tripping over their oversized paws and scratching against the couch when their ample ears flipped inside out. I watched with elation as they tumbled around the soft carpet floor, their playful yips filling the room. I looked down to find a puppy pulling at my shoelace. Another one scampered out from behind the couch and began pulling the other shoelace with its teeth. They pulled and pulled until the knot came untied and they were sent rolling to the ground, our laughter and playful yaps harmonizing in a happy unison. I watched as the two played and fought, their little black tails wagging excitedly and their tongues lapping out wildly. Every two minutes or so, one of their ears would turn inside out and I would go over and flip it back to its proper place. When the time came, it was easy to choose which puppy to bring home. I immediately leaped over to the original shoelace culprit and swung my arm around her, announcing to my dad that she was the one. And a pricey one at that. Her parents had been show dogs, and although we weren’t planning on showing her, the owner assured us that $900 was an amazing deal for a dog like her. But she was worth every penny. I proudly watched as my dad carried her up the stairs and across the glistening floors to the freshly mowed lawn outside. I grinned wildly when I learned that I would get to sit in the backseat with her. I placed her on my lap and decided then that today was definitely the happiest day of my life. My bliss was still intact even after she threw up her entire lunch on my lap during the ride home.